Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Feeling October


When I got out of work the sky was already getting dark, reminding me that the days are getting shorter. The daylight hours are slipping away from us quickly and it's adding to the anxiety I've been feeling in the last few days. Lots of changes and big life events will be happening for the month of October. Jon's moving here in four days, I'm turning THIRTY THREE and of course lots of prep for the wedding has to be completed. 

Last week I didn't think that I was stressed but my blood pressure is saying otherwise. At my yearly doctor's visit it was elevated, both before and after seeing my doctor. Admittedly the way I usually deal with stress is to ignore it, to trick myself into thinking that I'm not stressed so of course my blood pressure would be higher than normal. The last couple of days I've been feeling those old pangs of anxiety, very minor feelings of panic but I am all too familiar with how quickly that can change. 

I'm trying to keep myself focused on the present moment, on the immediate tasks at hand and not to let myself get overwhelmed. I've been running more because that normally helps to alleviate stress and to clear my mind. I'm going to try and get more sleep because I know lack of sleep makes me feel edgy. I'm also going to get back to meditating.

We'll see how this next months pans out.

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